It’s easy to let negative thoughts and feelings creep in during the COVID-19 pandemic. That’s why we’re kicking off a 5-week positivity challenge!

Positive thinking, or an optimistic attitude, is the practice of focusing on the good in any given situation. That doesn’t mean you ignore reality or make light of problems. Positive thinking can have a big positive impact on your mental health. So, we invite you to take part of this challenge! Monday-Friday we will post one activity we invite you to engage in. Feel free to share it and invite others to join in with #HealthyHeelsPositivity

• Day 1: Take a deep breath and smile
• Day 2: Make a list of qualities you appreciate about yourself
• Day 3: Make a list of qualities you appreciate about somebody else and share it with them/compliment someone
• Day 4: Get some fresh air and notice your surroundings
• Day 5: Video hang-out with friends
• Day 6: List 5 things you are extremely grateful for in your life
• Day 7: Say hi to a stranger (at least smile)
• Day 8: Tell your loved ones how much they mean to you
• Day 9: Positive TED Talk  https://www.ted.com/talks/meaghan_ramsey_why_thinking_you_re_ugly_is_bad_for_you/transcript

• Day 10: Create a playlist of songs that will inspire
• Day 11: Learn something new
• Day 12: Call a friend/family member with whom you’ve not spoken in a while
• Day 13: Open your windows and listen to the sounds of nature
• Day 14: Try to be positive for a whole day
• Day 15: Celebrate a recent “win” (nothing is too small to celebrate)
• Day 16: Create an uplifting playlist to get you in a good mindset before taking a final
• Day 17: Come up with a positive statement you can tell yourself over and over again when you’re in a negative situation or thinking negatively
• Day 18: Revisit/write a list of qualities you appreciate about yourself
• Day 19: Take a few deep breaths, stand up tall, and smile
• Day 20: Treat yourself! You made it through a challenging week!
•  Day 21: Start your day with a positive affirmation 
• Day 22: Identify 1-2 good things today, no matter how small 
• Day 23: Focus on the lessons you gained from “failures” 
• Day 24: Transform negative self-talk to positive self-talk
  • I’m so bad at this becomes…once I get more practice, I’ll be way better at this. 
  •  I shouldn’t have tried becomes…that didn’t work out as planned. I will try again and maybe next time
• Day 25: Set a plan for how you want to continue cultivating positivity 

 

Kyle Alexander, MSW, LCSW, (pronouns he/him/his) a queer Licensed Clinical Social Worker at UNC CAPS, offers his perspective on mental health in the LGBTQIA+ community during COVID-19.

Quarantine as a queer college student often means moving back home.

Home where we may have been kicked-out, abandoned, or made to feel un-welcome for being who we are. Being “othered” by society means we’ve had to find home within ourselves. We’ve found home within our chosen family. Home inside art, inside music, home within everything that is gay, that is light, that is alive. It wasn’t our choice to have to do the difficult work of looking-inward at a young age, but we are grateful for the wisdom and sharpened intuitions.

During COVID the ground feels uneven. Our routines stolen from us overnight. Time is starting to feel weird and being around family means parts of ourselves are going back inside the safety of the closet.

We’ve survived crises like this before. HIV/AIDS took countless of our community (and continues to disproportionally impact the Black and African American community ). We reject and fight against all racism and xenophobia and validate the increased pain people from China may be feeling right now due to discrimination.

We’ve lost so many beautiful artists, doctors, teachers, friends to a virus. We know the importance of community.

We know to protect one another we must first protect ourselves. And the first step of this is caring for our metal health.

Queerantine

Historically we know that due to the systemic and oppressive nature of homophobia and transphobia on one’s mental health. Therefore, at CAPS we want to validate that many queer and trans students (who may not find themselves quarantined in non-affirming home environment due to COVID-19), may currently be experiencing increased distress.

While no tip or skill presented on a blog post could hope to eradicate the impacts of systemic oppression on one’s mental health, this writer hopes to offer some small suggestions to queer readers who may be looking for ways to focus on their mental health during quarantine. This article will focus on advocating for safety and security inside the home and offer a challenge to explore the therapeutic aspects of nature during these stressful times.

The writer would like to acknowledge and validate that many other historically oppressed and minoritized communities are also suffering disproportionate rates of stress during the current pandemic and that one’s queerness does not exist in a silo. That one’s mental health during COVID is constantly influenced by one’s intersectional experiences around their racial, ethnic, socioeconomic, ability status, age etc.… Please look out for future content on the Healthy Heels blog that highlights other aspects of intersectionality, but for the purpose of focus and brevity this article chooses to center LGBTQIA+ identities.

In-Home Safety and “Alone Time”

Before speaking about going outside, it is important to highlight and mention the impact of finding a secure environment within your home. An important part of emotion regulation and focusing on one’s mental health is having a place in your home where you can be alone, relax, and feel safe and secure.

It is important to advocate in your household for personal space and “alone time.”

If you are not able to find solitude within your home (i.e. lots of siblings or family around), I want to challenge you to advocate with your housemates for this boundary and space.

For example, picking one chair in your house that you find comforting and asking your housemates, “when I am sitting in this chair, I need to not be disturbed for 30 mins.” Noise cancelling headphones can also be helpful during this alone time.

It is an immense privilege to live in a space that has enough room for privacy and to be able to afford noise cancelling headphones for that matter.  This writer wants to validate that it would be normal for folks who do not have access to privacy right now that fluctuations in mood and increased emotional dysregulation are totally normal and understandable side-effects of quarantine.

Nature Therapy

If you do not feel safe and secure indoors as queer person, it is important that you try to find a place in nature that you can regularly visit to feel secure and an increased sense of peace and groundedness. Perhaps prior to quarantine this would be hanging out with friends, relaxing a new coffee shop, or going out to dinner. During COVID these ways of finding community are difficult, therefore in North Carolina I challenge you to embrace all of the outdoor recreation and trails the Triangle has to offer.

Research suggest that regular engagement with nature positively impacts mood and overall mental health. With the advent of COVID, structure begins to disappear from many of our routines and our sense of time begins to blur and falter. Weekly engagement in nature helps anchor and ground ourselves to the present moment, facilitating a sense of regained mindful connection to time and space. This increased mindfulness (coupled with that added benefits of vital nutrients from the sun that improve mood) makes getting outside right now an easy choice if you want to spend some time focusing on your mental health.

Where do I go?

When this article was written NC Government continues to keep state parks open (and recommending that on the trails folks follow the CDC guidelines of remaining 6ft. apart from others when outside). Please continue to reference the updated CDC guidelines around outdoor activities when reading this article, as recommendations are evolving rapidly.

Those of us whom are privileged to live in the Triangle are able to access numerous hiking trails in the area.

Wherever you are, the best way to find a trail that works for you is to ask friends for recommendation or go online for lists of best hikes in the area. The All Trails application is a great free tool to download to search and filter the top-rated hikes based on your location.

If you can’t get to the trails, consider a sitting in a nice sunny patch of grass in your yard or garage. Even a 10-minute stroll around your neighborhood can boost your mood.

You don’t have to be an expert hiker but getting outside in a way that is safe and accessible to you feels important during this time of quarantine.

Bringing Nature Inside

If you can’t get outside, indoor plants are great for your mental health too. Surrounding yourself and tending to indoor plants can not only improve the air quality in your home but help to stabilize your mood. With increased time indoors, maybe it’s time to transplant one of your houseplants into a bigger pot or give some extra TLC to a plant that needs some watering that you’ve been neglecting.

 

Nature Therapy is #Trending on Instagram

If you have an Instagram, then you’ve seen Animal Crossing posts or content about Stardew Valley…. newer trending video games reminiscent of games like Harvest Moon. These video games situate the player 

in a virtual online community with their friends where they focus on being outside in nature and primarily working together to focus on farming, tending to animals, and building relationships. Player will encounter openly queer characters in these games and the ability to date and build non-heteronormative relationships.

It is no coincidence that during quarantine video games that allow us to escape into a virtual relationship with nature (while also connecting with friends) are trending. While ideally, we would like to spend some time each day outdoors for our mental health, distracting through the mindful use of video games is also an effective way to stabilize mood during quarantine.

Final Thoughts

Nature and the outdoors have always been there and will continue to be there way after this virus is done. While we struggle to focus on our mental health due to being stuck indoors, we must look outdoors. Nature can help our mental health at a time we need it most.

If you try these strategies and find you’re still struggling, CAPS 24/7 is available for UNC students at 919-966-3658. CAPS is also offering 2 digital support groups: a support group for UNC undergraduate seniors during COVID and a support group for any UNC student during COVID.

Additional Resources:

• National Crisis Text Line: Text “TALK” to 741741 – National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-TALK(8255)
• If you are in crisis you can also call or text the LGBTQIA+ organization the Trevor Project
• Subscribe to the UNC LGBT Center List Serv. to stay up to date with evens in Chapel Hill and the Triangle: 

Note on guidelines for social distancing: At time of publication the CDC still recommends social distancing (i.e. staying at least 6ft away from each other while exercising/hiking etc.. Please continue to review CDC guidelines for updated recommendations around COVID-19.

Hi UNC students,

We hope this message finds you safe and healthy; we’ve been thinking of you during this uncertain time and wanted to pass along resources for the queer community.

QUEER EXCHANGE: GREATER TRIANGLE AREA 

The queer exchange in the greater triangle area is a space for queer community to connect the dots between what’s needed and what’s offered between the queers you know and who they know.

DURHAM MUTUAL AID  

Mutual Aid space for Durham, NC is a space for sharing resources, guidance, and organizing for mutual aid in Durham, NC during the COVID-19 pandemic.

@QUEERANTINECommunity on Instagram 

Connect to a queerantine community and daily updates of activities across social media.

QUEER ART on Instagram

QueerpocalypseSolutions is collaborative art-life projects for queer people by queer people.

 

 

CAPS remains open at this time for virtual and in-person visits M – F 8am – 5pm and the CAPS 24/7 service is available at 919-966-3658.

If you are experiencing concerns related to safety of yourself or others, please call 919-966-3658, 911, or go to your nearest emergency room. Additionally, you can contact the follow crisis hotlines: National Crisis Text Line: Text “TALK” to 741741; National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-TALK (8255). 

 

Not one of us chose to be in the middle of a global crisis, right? Yet, we are all experiencing a major shift in our daily routines and overall lifestyle. This is difficult, but maybe especially difficult for those who live with specific mental illnesses. This perceived loss of control can lead to increased anxiety levels, intrusive thoughts, and depressive symptoms due to a  more sedentary lifestyle. As humans, we like “to know” things. This certainty provides us an illusion of having control over our environment. Maybe we’re realizing we really enjoyed the normalcy of our lives, and the “chaos” of the unknown doesn’t feel too pleasant right now.

How can we lean into our discomfort?

Name it!

What are you feeling? A Feelings Wheel may help you to name your emotions. It is also helpful to identify the physical sensations and thoughts that accompany these emotions. Although, we cannot control our emotions, but we can manage them. We have a lot more power of our emotions when we put them out in front, rather than hiding them behind a mask or how we prefer to be seen.

Sit with it!

Don’t judge emotions that arise. Know that emotions are not good or bad. They are simply energy in motion; get it, emotion. Let them flow. They will come and they will go. Although some emotions may feel unpleasant, we can find comfort knowing that this too will pass. If “fear” has decided to come visit today. You are still in charge. “Fear” can come along for the ride, but “fear” does not get to drive.

Shift it!

We do not have to react to the emotion. Once we acknowledge the feeling (name it), identify it as nonthreatening (sit with it), then we can begin to decide how we would like to respond rather than reacting (shift it).

Here is a list of ways you may shift unpleasant emotions:

• Reframe thoughts that preceded the emotion.
• Choose to engage in an activity that calms you:
  • Deep breathing
  • Grounding
  • Meditation
  • Listening to music
  • Journaling
  • Connecting with a supportive person

• Create an appropriate boundary if the emotion was a result of someone else’s behavior
• Try a healthy coping mechanism that you identify before the unpleasant emotion arising:
  • Take a break
  • Have a healthy snack
  • Engage in mindful movement, etc.

If you try these strategies and find you’re still struggling, CAPS 24/7 is available for UNC students at 919-966-3658. CAPS is also offering 2 digital support groups: a support group for UNC undergraduate seniors during COVID and a support group for any UNC student during COVID.

 

It’s certainly a time of uncertainty, which makes it normal for you to be worried. If you feel that worry is taking over your life, it might be worth trying to find ways to limit the time you spend worrying.

Psychologists say there are two types of worry:

1. Real problem worries: Actual problems affecting you right now that you can act on now. Examples: “I can’t afford my phone bill.” “My hands are dirty from weeding. I need to wash them.“
2. Hypothetical worries: Things that do not currently exist but might happen in the future. Examples: “What if everyone I know dies?” “Maybe all this worry will make me a terrible person.“

People who are bothered by worry often experience it as uncontrollable and time consuming. They also often see worry’s value. So instead of trying to get rid of worry, you can try to postpone your worries.

Set time in your day to do nothing but worry and limit that time. Try this for at least one week:

• Prepare. Decide when and for how long your worry time will be. Set it aside each day.
  • Consider the time of day you think will be the best to attend to your worries and when you’re most likely to be undisturbed.
  • If you’re unsure, 15 – 30 minutes per day at 7 pm is often a good starting point.
• Worry postponement. During the day, decide which worries are problems you can act on now or whether they are hypothetical and should be postponed.
  • If it’s not a worry you can do something about right now – redirect your attention through mindfulness.
  • Focus on your senses.
  • Focus attention externally.
  • Say to yourself “I’m not going to engage in this worry now. I will engage in this worry later.”
• Worry time. Use your dedicated time for worrying. Try to use all your worry time, even if you do not feel you have much to worry about or even if worries don’t seem pressing at this time.
  • You might write down the hypothetical worries you’ve had during the day. How concerning are they to you now? Are any of them worries that can lead you to practical actions?
  • Reflect on these worries – do they give you the same emotional kick when you think on them now as they did when they first arose? Can any of the worries be converted into a practical problem to which you can seek a solution?

Remember to respond to yourself and your worries with the compassion you’d offer a loved one or close friend.

 

For more strategies for dealing with worry during these difficult times, visit https://www.psychologytools.com/assets/covid-19/guide_to_living_with_worry_and_anxiety_amidst_global_uncertainty_en-us.pdf

If you are looking for ways to connect and feel supported through this experience, CAPS is offering two COVID-19 online support groups through ZOOM (if you are interested, click here if you are an undergraduate senior, and here if you are any other UNC student – must be residing in state.) If you notice your mental health symptoms worsening, or you feel you or a friend are in crisis, you can call CAPS at 919-966-3658 or the Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 800-273-8255.

During this time of shelter in place orders and physical isolation, social media and virtual interaction have been a lifeline connecting us to loved ones, colleagues, classmates, and information about the broader world.  It seems like everything has gone online, from college courses to yoga classes to movie night or games with friends. Gone are the days of being told to “unplug,” and face to face interactions with our communities are out of the question for most of us.

Some people might naturally be able to make the best of this new environment, but for others constant digital connection can worsen anxiety and create feelings of isolation or depression. Here are some ways to maintain your mental health while staying virtually connected:

Notice Your Mood, and Respect What You Need

The first step to setting good digital boundaries is to be aware of and honest about your needs and emotions. Check in with how you feel after looking at social media, reading the news, or messaging with a friend.  If you notice that you’re feeling pressured to connect with others constantly, that looking at social media makes you feel worse about yourself or your situation, or that your mood worsens after reading the news, it might be time to re-evaluate your digital boundaries.

Be Mindful of What You Share

We’re all in this together, and lots of people are being really vulnerable online right now. That can be wonderful; it humanizes us, allows us to reach out for support, and maintains our connections with each other. But it might not feel right for everyone, or in all circumstances. Chances are that you already know how to be smart about posting on social media, but it feels like all the rules are changing now. It might be a good time to sit down and think about parts of your life you don’t want to share, or how to show different parts of your experience to close friends versus all of your followers. [This goes for online classes as well: think “would I say/show/write this if I were in a lecture hall?”]

Beware of Online Fear of Missing Out

Does it look like everyone is still living their best life in quarantine? Do you feel like you aren’t getting invited to the (virtual) parties everyone else is attending? Remember, people are still only showing one version of themselves online, and it may not reflect their full reality. If you notice you feel worse about yourself after scrolling through social media, try reaching out to close friends or family for deeper connection – maybe a video call or some time talking on the phone about how you’re doing.

Watch out for the flip side of this as well – feeling pressured to show your best self online, all the time. You might notice that when you engage in self care you’re thinking about how it will look to others, or about posting it later. Sharing the things that are helping us cope can be great, but sometimes it’s nice to enjoy nature, exercise or create something without sharing, and noticing if there is any difference in the feeling it creates.

Limit Exposure to the News

One way many of us try to manage our anxiety is to seek out information about whatever is making us anxious, feeling that the knowledge will make us safer, or help us prepare for the worst. Given the endless news coverage of the current pandemic, coupled with how much time we’re spending on our phones and devices right now, it can be easy to slip into a pattern of reading the news constantly. But remember: more information doesn’t make you safer. So long as you are following the guidelines issued by public health organizations such as the CDC and your local government, you are doing your part to keep yourself and your community safe. Reading all of the new details may only worsen anxiety and increase a feeling of helplessness.

In order to combat these negative effects, you can practice mindful news consumption. For instance, choosing only to look at the news for half an hour in the morning or evening to catch up, making sure you have someone to process your feelings with afterward, and choosing one or two high quality news sources instead of clicking anything you see posted are all ways to preserve your mental wellbeing while staying informed.

Seek Healthy Connections

Meaningful connection during this time will look different for everyone. Some people might keep checking in with their small circle of friends, while others will embrace large group virtual hangouts, engage with their community support networks online, or share videos of their shelter-in-place routine. If you are looking for ways to connect and feel supported through this experience, CAPS is offering two COVID-19 online support groups through ZOOM (if you are interested, click here if you are an undergraduate senior, and here if you are any other UNC student – must be residing in state.) If you notice your mental health symptoms worsening, or you feel you or a friend are in crisis, you can call CAPS at 919-966-3658 or the Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 800-273-8255.

This blog was written by Christine Crowther, a CAPS staff who works primarily with the UNC Medical School. 

 

 

It’s tough to feel connected when being physically distanced from people you adore. Like Leia and Luke, you can stay connected even from afar. Physical distancing doesn’t have to mean social isolation or disconnection. Here are some suggestions to foster, maintain, or even enhance social intimacy in these difficult times:

• Use physical closeness to connect with people who are nearby.  Speak to your neighbors from over a fence or across balconies. Talk to people you meet outside…at a distance.
• Get some fresh air and invite the people you live with to join you.
• Reach out and let people know you’re thinking about them and that you care – especially if there is someone you know who may be particularly vulnerable to social isolation. Frequency is more important than duration. Don’t worry about being boring. Social connection is valuable even when there isn’t much to say.
• Send voice memos to loved ones. You may feel a greater sense of connection than writing a text provides.
• Create group text threads. A lot of conversation, humor and information can flow there. You can ignore it when you want, or jump in when you can – and when you do, there will probably be someone to respond to you. It’s comforting to know that you’re in a group and can always get someone’s attention.
• Leave a note under a loved one’s door or on their doorstep.
• Be generous to others. Giving to and helping others not only helps the recipient, it enhances your wellbeing too. Is there a way to help others around you, no matter how small the gesture?
• Volunteer online. This is a great way to do good for others right from your home.
• Teach your skills. If you’ve been wanting to show the world your special talents, now’s your chance. Use your phone to create short teaching videos and post these online.
• Read a book to a child, grandparent or someone who is ill over the phone or via video chat.
• Offer to help people who don’t usually use technology. Show parents, grandparents, other generations how to use the technology you take for granted and find easy to navigate. Remember, be patient!
• Start a contact list of folks who need extra support in your community. Consider starting a social media group to share information and resources.
• Set up a gratitude tree – every member posts a message or sends a text to other members to share something they are grateful for.
• Set daily challenges with a buddy or group. These could include a healthy habit, a mindful practice, a creative pursuit. Be sure to encourage and check in daily to stay motivated.
• Schedule dates and times to watch the same TV shows/movies with someone and message each other your thoughts along the way. It’ll be like sitting on the couch together!
• Host a virtual get-together. Meet your friends for coffee or lunch online via group video chat. Celebrate birthdays, holidays or milestones.
• Go on a virtual “double date” by video.
• Do an online workout. There are thousands online! Do the fitness work together but in separate locations with your exercise buddy.
• Have a dance party from separate locations.
• Find educational materials to absorb. Take a virtual walk on the Great Wall of China, visit a museum, monument or natural wonder online.
• Create study groups. Zoom with friends while studying. Everyone  can be on mute to not distract each other. You can still see each other and unmute if you have something to say. It’ll be like working together in the library surrounded by friends and fellow students. Being together in silence is still powerful connection.
• Send funny photos or videos. Be positive and take time to laugh.
• Send flashback messages to family and friends to say “look what we were doing 5 years ago today!” You could take out an old box of photos or go through your phone or social media. Reminisce together.
• Rekindle a friendship with someone whom you haven’t been in touch with in a while.
• Move your book group online – or join or start one. It’s a great time to read and talk about books.

Strangely, you may notice feeling socially connected even when physically distanced. Life has slowed down, offering a chance to connect deeper or in a more sustained way with people.

What strategies have helped you stay connected even while physically distant?

 

This video and list was compiled by Anthony Teasdale, PhD, a CAPS provider. Dr. Teasdale received a Master of Arts (M.A.) and a Doctorate of Philosophy (Ph.D.) in Counseling Psychology from The University of Maryland at College Park.  His professional interests include identity development, self-compassion, diversity and multicultural issues, supervision and training, career development, and working with college student populations.  Outside CAPS, Dr. Teasdale enjoys watching sports, movies (especially Star Wars), playing tennis (badly), and travel.